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TheRollingRobos by Scottie

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Pip here. It's getting really chilly and dark - I remember this last year and I slept under my house for a while. But now I have lots of cosy places. I am not feeling the cold that much - I have a lot more fur than last year and nothing will keep me out of my food bowl and sand bath. But the big baby next to me. Well - he is being a real baby! He just stays in his nest and sleeps. I did much more wheel running than him last night. I get a bit jealous sometimes as the big baby is normally let out every single night. Much more than me. But that's partly because I am not sure if I want to come out or not. I do, but then I don't, but then I do. Once I'm out it's great, but then I want to go home again.

Actually. he's not a baby any more - but he's still younger than me.
Hello Pip. The big baby sounds really babyish not to run on his wheel as much as you. I run on my wheel for hours.
 
Hiya Pip, Scottie here,

life's not easy when living near a big baby.
When i lived in Savic Row, my neighbour behaved like a big baby.

Is he a Syrian by any chance? No disrespect to Syrians but some never grow up. I heard that male humans are a bit like that.

I'm so much happier since i moved to Moonrise Boulevard where i'm the only hamster in the street.
There are the humans of course but can't have everything.

You see, part of the problem is that humans are so hard to tame.
They don't always do what we want them to do.
That second when you decide that you do want to come out of your cage, they should be there with your taxi.
But no, they arrive a minute later by which time you would probably have changed your mind at least twice.

Any taming tips, please do let me know.
 
I have a few taming tips for humans. The first one, which is something a robo like me can do and take advantage of my tiny size - is to be intimidating. By showing your tummy. It works every time. If my human comes over to say hello when I'm busy enjoying food on my shelf, it's really annoying. So I flatten myself against the front bars with my tummy facing outwards and she can't see my face. It always makes her back off because she can't talk to me properly then.

The second one is to stare very hard at the human - out stare them basically. This can go on for a long time and shows them who is boss - I can sit and stare for a long time. The human keeps talking to me thinking I'm listening but actually I'm thinking about going on my wheel.

The third one, is to run up my ladder very fast when the human opens the cage door and pretend I'm about to run out but then veer quickly up the ramp instead. This makes me laugh because it makes her squeal. You have to be careful doing this one though because I actually fell out once.
 
Hi Pip,

i tried your intimidations technique and showed her my belly. I did my best to stick my chest out to make myself look bigger.

It backfired on me!!

She didn't look at my belly but stared at my paws. Help! I think she's after my nails as well now.
It's nearly Halloween and i'm convinced she's a witch. She needs mine and Rodney's nails for her cauldron.

I'm scared!! Scottie
 
Scottie you sound right to be scared. It does sound like Big Nose is a witch. I think you need to plan your escape route.
 
I am most annoyed. I was quietly looking for seeds when Busy Body woke up. I heard her say 'Is munchkin awake?'. According to the Oxford dictionary, this is a rude remark about my height! How dare Busy Body make such a rude remark. :mad:
 
Hey Orko,

it's Finley, pssst, keep your voice down and don't look in my direction, pssst.
I just heard on the grapevine, no, not the ones in your tank, that you got caught for stealing tofu. Don't say anything and ask for a lawyer.

I hope they didn't find any evidence in your pouches and BB can bail you out.

All the best mate and keep your ears up.
 
Thank you Finley. I am in disgrace as Busy Body said I get plenty so there was no need for me to do this. Thank you for your support.
 
Orko, maybe it was a cry for help.
The humans idea of plenty means as much as they can eat.
They don't understand the concept of eat one now and hoard one for tomorrow and the day after and after and after and then add another weeks worth just to be on the safe side.
Finley
 
You are right my brother. Busy Body says she worries it will go mouldy when I hide extra in my hoard. Well, it will be my mould so it is none of her business!
 
Orko, maybe it was a cry for help.
The humans idea of plenty means as much as they can eat.
They don't understand the concept of eat one now and hoard one for tomorrow and the day after and after and after and then add another weeks worth just to be on the safe side.
Finley
Pip here. My human really can't complain about my hoards - the big baby has been out on the sofa and told me there is a massive hoard under the sofa cushions that must have been there a long time (yes I found all sorts down the sofa cushions and a load of crumbs under them!).

The big baby is out less than me at the moment. He says it's a bit cold. I don't know why he feels more cold than me as he's bigger than me but maybe I'm just built different. I've stopped calling him the big baby now because he's not a baby any more. But he'll always be younger than me so I'll call him junior.
 
It sounds like your human has made her own hoard. This is really good, Pip because it means you have trained her really well.
 
Ha ha that really made me laugh out loud rainbow!
 
Friends, it's Scottie and i have to tell you about my awful ordeal today at the hands of the witch.
She came for me.
First of all i didn't know what was happening because my home was moving! Turns out that i live in a mobile home. My house has wheels and someone moved it into the bathroom.
I rushed out of my burrow to investigate and was looking right into the ugly mug of the big nosed witch. Worse was to come.
She tricked me into my taxi and dropped me onto her lap then picked me up and put me into a headlock.
And then she had a very very close look at my paws holding some torture device!
She said they were clippers!!

I was beyond scared at this point and squeaked at her. She ignored me and i squeaked again as loud as i could but she sneered at me, the evil witch.
I had no choice but to resort to violence when she held my paw in her big paw so i bit her finger hard, drawing blood. Success!

She dropped me and i landed on her lap, made a run for it but she scooped me up and put me in a box.
I tried and tried but couldn't get out and fell asleep under a hide that looked like a cat and gave me nightmares.

I think the witch wanted me for meat for her stew in her cauldron but put me back home because she wants a fat hamster.

Poor Jack is in real danger.
 
I am shocked and horrified by your ordeal! You are lucky to be alive after that. It sounds like the witch was collecting your nails to add to a spell. I suspect the spell will be for you to be (shudders) bonded and tame.

You did really well to bite and make her bleed. That should have scared her away and know not to mess with you again.

It sounds like Jack will be the next victim. This is very sad news. A dark day for all hamsters and fitting this is on Halloween.
 
Hello friends, last night was so funny. I played a trick on Busy Body. She was tapping which is usually done by Tapper, anyway although the horrid light was on I went around silently pouching seeds. I was a silent ninja attacking the seeds and pouching them. Busy Body had no idea. I think she has bad eye sight because when I saw her once she has a force field around her eyes. My home has a force field too. I have tried many times to get through it but I cannot. There is nothing visible so the force field is the invisible way Busy Body keeps me trapped.
 
Hello friends. I want to ask you all for some advice. I know we all seem to have a rough time of it but do you ever get insults thrown at you by the humans? When Busy Body pokes about in my home she calls me her 'precious boy' *Shudder of repulsion* How dare she! My mother was a fine sow who could pouch a remarkable amount of food. I am angry and offended and not sure what to do about it.

Yours angrily,
Orko
 
I think busybody is your new Mum Orko! She adopted you. She obviously thinks you're very special.

My human does this a bit too. She puts on this little baby voice but seems to have forgotten I'm not a baby any more! I am middle aged. So I gave her a look and she toned it down a bit. I need to teach her some more.
 
Pip, you are the best at training your human. I really admire you and want to be more like you. Your human is a quick learner but I fear Busy Body is just too slow.
 
Give her a stare Orko - hide behind something first then pop your head out and stare. Eventually you'll be able to do it without hiding behind something. The other thing is to dance up and down in your food bowl and stare - when there aren't enough mealworms in it.
 
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